How to fix your entire life in 1 day
如何在一天内改变你的整个人生
DAN KOE
III -- You aren't where you want to be because you're afraid to be there
第三章｜你之所以不在理想的位置，是因为你害怕待在那里
The important thing for you to remember is that it does not matter in the least how you got the idea or where it came from. You may never have met a professional hypnotist. You may never have been formally hypnotized. But if you have accepted an idea --- from yourself, your teachers, your parents, friends, advertisements, from any other source --- and further, if you are firmly convinced that idea is true, it has the same power over you as the hypnotist's words have over the hypnotized subject.
--- Maxwell Maltz
你需要牢记的一点是：一个观念如何进入你的头脑、来自何处，其实都不重要。
你可能从未见过职业催眠师，也从未接受过正式的催眠。
但只要你接受了某个观念------无论它来自你自己、老师、父母、朋友、广告，或任何其他来源，并且你坚信它是真的，那么它对你的影响力，与催眠师的话语对被催眠者的影响并无二致。
------ 麦克斯韦·马尔兹
Here's how you've become who you are today, and how you will become who you will be tomorrow. This is the anatomy of identity:
下面解释你如何成为今天的你，以及你将如何塑造明天的自己。
这就是"身份"形成并运作的过程：
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You want to achieve a goal
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You perceive reality through the lens of that goal
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You only notice "important" information and ideas that allows you to achieve that goal (learning)
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You act toward that goal and receive feedback that you are progressing toward it
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You repeat that behavior until it becomes automatic and unconscious (conditioning)
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That behavior becomes a part of who you think you are ("I am the type of person who...")
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You defend your identity to maintain psychological consistency
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Your identity shapes new goals, restarting the cycle, and if that identity is disadvantageous toward a good life, this gets bad very quick
1、你想要实现某个目标
2、你通过这个目标的"透镜"来感知现实
3、你只会注意到那些被你视为"重要"的信息与想法，即那些有助于实现目标的内容（学习）
4、你围绕目标采取行动，并获得"正在前进"的反馈
5、你不断重复这些行为，直到它们变得自动化、无意识化（条件化）
6、这些行为逐渐成为你自我认知的一部分（"我是那种会......的人"）
7、你会本能地维护这一身份，以维持内在心理的连贯性
8、身份最终会反过来决定你的目标，使这一循环不断加速；而如果这个身份本身出了问题，人生将迅速走偏
The unfortunate reality is that you must break the cycle between steps 6 and 7, but this process starts when you are a child. You have the goal of survival. You are dependent on your parents to teach you how to survive. You had to conform.
一个不幸的现实是：你必须在第 6 步与第 7 步之间打断这个循环，而这个循环，早在你童年时期就已经开始。
你最初的目标，是生存。
你依赖父母教会你如何生存，因此你必须顺从。
And since the way most people teach is through reward and punishment, unless you adopt their beliefs and values, you will be punished. You don't actually think for yourself until you see through this. But your parents have also gone through this process throughout their entire lives.
由于大多数教育本质上是通过奖惩机制来完成的，只要你不认同他们的信念与价值观，负面后果就会随之出现。
在你意识到这一切是如何发生的之前，你并没有真正开始独立思考。
但你的父母本身也在一生中反复经历了同样的过程。
That's where it can get dangerous. Your parents, unless they broke the pattern themselves, were conditioned by the culturally accepted ideas of success from the Industrial age. They also carry the best and worst conditioning from their parents and their parents' parents.
危险正是在这里出现的。
如果你的父母自己没有打破这个模式，那么他们往往被工业时代所认可的"成功观"所条件化。
同时，他们还携带着来自上一代、上上一代的最好与最糟糕的条件化结果。
To take it a layer deeper, once you fulfill your physical survival needs (which is quite easy to do in today's world, you're practically born into safety), you start to survive on the conceptual or ideological level.
再往深一层看，当你的生理生存需求得到满足之后，在当今世界，这其实相当容易，你几乎一出生就处在安全之中------你便开始在观念层面、意识形态层面求生。
You may not try to protect and reproduce your body, but you absolutely protect and reproduce your mind.
你也许不再忙于保命与繁衍，但你一定会保护并复制你的思想。
It's not difficult to see the war of ideas on the internet, and the participants are individual and group identities. When your body feels threatened, you go into fight or flight. When your identity feels threatened, the same thing happens.
互联网中的观念战争并不难发现，而真正参战的，是个人身份与群体身份。
当你的身体感到威胁时，你会进入"战斗"或"逃跑"状态。
当你的身份感到威胁时，完全相同的反应也会发生。
If you are heavily identified with a political ideology (by the process we talked about just before), you will feel threatened when someone challenges your beliefs. You literally feel the stress. You feel, emotionally, like you were just slapped in the face. Since most people don't analyze their emotions for truth, you tend to get stuck in echo chambers and double down on claims that harm yourself and others.
如果你通过前面所描述的过程，深度认同某种政治意识形态，有人挑战你的信念时，你就会感到被威胁。
你会真实地感受到压力；在情绪上，你的感觉就像是被人当面打了一巴掌。
由于大多数人并不会对情绪进行"真实性分析"，他们往往会被困在信息茧房中，并不断加码那些既伤害自己、也伤害他人的观点。
If you were raised in a religious household, and did not think for yourself, you will fight and attack others who threaten your psychological safety within that little bubble. The same thing happens when you unconsciously see yourself as a lawyer, a gamer, or somebody else who would not take the actions to achieve a better life.
如果你成长于宗教家庭，却从未形成独立思考，那么你很可能会攻击那些威胁你"心理安全泡泡"的人。
当你在无意识中把自己固化为某种身份------无论是"律师""玩家"，还是任何一种让你不再采取行动去追求更好人生的角色------同样的事情还会一再上演。
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